Keep me in your heart
by FallenDarkAngel2
Summary: Just another Beck and Jade one-shot. Read and review please :  Thanks and enjoy!


Disclaimer- I do not own Victorious

AN- So I just wrote this. I like this vey much and I'd like it even more if you like it! So please review and tell me what you think! Thanks! Enjoy!

Look at me with those loving eyes and talk to me like you use to. Walk with me through the beaches at night and tell me how much that you love me. Tell me you still need me to survive. Tell me how much I mean to you; tell me that I'm meant to be with you. Just tell me anything that proves you still love me. I can't keep going on like this anymore, Beck. Me and you, and you and me…we were everything. Why did it have to stop? What did I do to make it stop?

When you look at me, I see nothing in your eyes. They're dull. That small spark I use to see when you looked at me is gone. The way you speak to me is cruel. There is no compassion in your voice anymore. The sweet soft voice you use to speak to me is now so rough and cold. You're words are no longer soothing to me, they stab me instead. When we walk through the hallways you don't hold my hand anymore. I have to slip my hand into yours if I want some affection. You walk away when I'm not looking. The distant between us is growing farther and farther apart. Every time we talk you'd tell me you love me but that has stopped. I have to make you say it and when you say it, you say it so bluntly. You never actually mean it anymore. You always said you love me but why did it stop? And every day when I come over to your house, you'd say that you need me to survive but you stopped. I asked you at school once "do you need me to survive?" you hesitated. And you didn't answer me; you simply nodded and turned away claiming to be going to class. I asked you yet another question, "how much do I mean to you?" and you said nothing. Instead you leaned down and kissed me. That kiss was forced, I know. You did it so you wouldn't have to answer me. When we kissed I felt so empty. Our kiss use to be so passionate. The next day was the day of my play. After the show I saw you, I came up to you and asked if I was meant to be with you. You simply smiled and gave me flowers. That smile was fake, you can't fool me. You said I was _good_ in the play. You _always_ say I was the _best_. Why the sudden change?

We're growing farther and farther apart and you can't even see it. What changed between us, Beck? When we meet it's like you don't want to be with me. You stopped loving me but why? That's all I want to know, why don't you love me anymore? What did I do wrong, Beck? Please tell me…

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We haven't really spoken in a while. A few words are shared but its mostly us setting in the coffee shop, sipping our coffee slowly. Then you grab your keys and drive me home. No goodbye kiss or goodbye hugs. Just "I'll see you tomorrow". You don't call me that night either. I know we can both feel the distance growing but we never seem to end it. Everyday I feel like you're going to dump me. But you never do. Everyday I live with that fear of you leaving me. And then another day goes by and we're together. We're still a couple, a couple that doesn't even believe they should go on. A couple that knows its over but doesn't want to say it. I know, Beck. I know its over between us. Your too kind to end it and I'm too weak to end it. I don't want you to be in this by force, I love you to much to keep you with me when you're not happy. All I want is for you to be happy. And if I have to end it, then I guess it would be for the best. Its never sweet to end it. The pain of letting you go will be never ending. But that question will always be with me. Why did you stop loving me? All I want is to know why. Just tell me and I'll be happy.

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So I did it. I finally got the courage to do it. I did it in the coffee shop. And when I said those words, I felt like I was being stabbed. You only looked at me. Then your blank expression turned into a warm smile. Yes, you smiled and said it was ok. Then you turned away and went home. Not even an argue, not a single protest or not even a wonder of why I said it was over. It was for the best, you said. I somehow felt my heart get warmer. It hurt though; it hurt so badly that you left. I didn't want to; I didn't want you to go. I never wanted you to go but the one thing I love more then you, is seeing you happy. I know leaving you made you happy but you were too kind to say so. But I guess you already knew that in the end, I'd be the one to end it. And even though I broke up with you, I never had the courage to ask why you stopped loving me. I never asked, I was afraid of the answer. I was afraid of what you might have said, even if the curiosity was killing me, I couldn't bring myself to ask. I'm pathetic, I know. But I still want to know why you stopped loving me. I'll just never have the courage to ask.

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A month, it's been a month. I've lurk in the shadows while you get brighter and brighter everyday. I knew it, you are getting happier with me being out of the picture. I know you were better off without me. And even if we're broken up, you still smile at me in the hall ways. You still talk to me every once in a while. Its not a long conversation but its just to catch up with each other a bit. I won't lie though, it still hurts. I still cry in the middle of the night because I'm not with you but you're better off without me. And I can't hold you back now. This is for the best, right? You seem happier…and lets not forget all those girls who are throwing themselves at you, now that you don't have a girlfriend anymore. But it still makes me happy that you reject them all. It still makes me hope that you still, maybe even a little bit, love me. You are everything to me, Beck. Now we're not one anymore, we're two. Two individuals that were once one person, but we grew apart and now its over. It's better now. My heart can still be hurting but its learning to heal. Although days are going by, I still have that same question for you. Why did you stop loving me? That's all I really want to know. I think that if I get the courage to ask you, and you finally tell me, then my heart would be able to heal completely. I just hope and pray that one day I get the answer from you.

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I never thought it would hurt this much. I thought I was over you. I thought I wanted to see you happy again. But you are, you are happier…with her. That day when I saw you talking to her, I never thought anything was going on. Then I saw you hold hands with her, I thought you were just being friendly. And then I saw her playing with your hair, I remembered you only let me do that. Again, I never thought anything of it. But then I saw you kiss her. You held her waist and pressed her against her locker and kissed her. I knew I couldn't deny it anymore. You and her were together. I felt me heart shatter again. I thought I learned to get over you. It has been 2 months; I should have gotten over you. Yet when I saw your lips meet her, I broke. I couldn't feel anything anymore. I just felt like you had forgotten all about me. You forgot about everything we've been through. Every single thing we shared was over. I know it was stupid but I had hoped you still thought of me and how much you use to love me. But I guess you never did because there you were, kissing another girl that wasn't me. I started to wonder if maybe, you'd learn to love her more then you'd ever love me. I wanted so bad to be in her place right now. I wanted to be that girl you put your lips on. I wanted to be that girl you held hands with. I wanted so badly to be with you again. I know that's impossible now. You moved on, I guess I should too. You're with her, I have to accept it. I can't help but to wonder why you love her. And that makes me wonder again, why did you stop loving me? I know now that I need that answer in order to move on.

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I wait for you in that same coffee shop where we first met. The same coffee shop you asked me to be your girl friend in, the same coffee shop I broke up with you. Now here we are again, in the same coffee shop. You smiled at me and sat across from me. I looked at you and did my best to smile. We ordered our coffee and waited in such silence, I felt like screaming and just running out the store. The waiter brought our coffee, it was the same waiter we've always had when we use to come here, back we were together. I felt my heart sink when the waiter spoke. He said, "Aw it's nice to see the couple back here again. I've missed taking your orders; you guys are so cute together." Then he walked away after having brought us our coffee. I felt me face turn red and you laughed and looked down at his coffee. After a few minutes of pure silence, you spoke.

"Why are we here?" You asked. I felt eyes grow tears. I knew why we were here but I was so afraid to ask you. I opened my mouth to speak and waited for words to come out. But nothing happened. I looked down at my coffee. I couldn't do it. I couldn't say it. I brought you here and I couldn't even answer your question. I felt so stupid. I glanced up to him and he looked at me with such concern in his eyes.

"Jade?" You spoke so softly. I looked back down. I couldn't do it; I brought you here for nothing. I did this for nothing! I felt like I was going to explode. Before I knew it, I was out of that coffee shop and running so fast to the woods across the street from the coffee shop. I ran and ran non stop, past the trees and creeks, I ran until I reached my end point. Until I was gasping for air and I felt my legs collapses. Tears ran down my face and I fell to the ground. I'm so stupid. I'm so, so, so stupid! It wasn't until I felt arms around me that I froze.

"It's ok." It was him…Beck. You was out of breath and your arms were wrapped around me. I burst out crying into your chest. I held on to your shirt and cried. You came, you ran after me! You chased me and you're right here, wrapping your arms around me and comforting me. But why? Why is you doing this?

"Why, Beck?" I asked through my tears.

"Why what?" You asked pulling slowly away from me to see my face.

"Why did you stop loving me?" I exclaimed. Why? Please just tell me why! That's all I want to know. Please just tell me.

"Jade…who said I stopped loving you?" You said smiling at me. Your hand rubbed against me cheek. I looked at you, and you whipped me tears away.

"Jade, I never stopped loving you. I would never stop loving you."

"Then why did you begin to distant your self from me?" I asked confused.

"…I don't know." Your voice faded. You looked away and stood up. I sat on the ground and watched you pace around.

"Jade, I love you…I will never stop loving you. But…I'm not _in_ love with you." You said. You stopped pacing and looked at me.

"You'll always be in my heart."

I stood up and walked to him. You…still loves me? You still loves me…that's all I wanted to hear. Just to hear you say that he still loves me makes me feel better. I felt my heart get warmer. So you're not _in_ love with me, I guess I'm not _in_ love with you either. I just don't want you to leave me behind. I want to be in your heart forever just like you'll always be in mine. I focused back on you. I smiled and hugged you.

"I love you Beck." I said. You hugged me back. And just for that moment I never wanted to let him go. But I did. We pulled apart and you smiled at me. You held my hand and we walked back to the coffee shop. You drove me home and as I got out of the car, you grabbed arm. I looked at you. You leaned over and gave me a kiss on my cheek. You smiled and I smiled. I watched as you drove away. This is it, this is the time when my heart will begin to heal. We'll never be together again but this is how its meant to be. I finally got my closure.

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It's been years since me and Beck have dated. And here I am, sitting in the front row. Watching him get married to another girl and I heard them exchange vowels. I smiled when they said "I do". I felt my heart grow warm and fuzzy. As the walked down the aisle he looked at me and smiled. I waved and watched him happily leave with his bride. And that's it. This is how our love story ends. We fell apart and we've fixed the pieces. Now he's with his new wife and I'm with my new boyfriend. Yes after all these years, I still love him and he still loves me but we moved on. We might not be _in_ love with each other but we're still in each others heart. And that will never change.


End file.
